The Real America...

When the weather in Miami doesn’t improve and you get bored of walking along streets getting battered by strong winds and soaked through from ridiculous down pours, all the while getting a sweat on because its still a billion degrees; you head off to Sarasota in west Florida to meet up with an old mate and co-founder of G Unit, Gavin “G-Bird” Frost!

So me and J are staying with Gav and his Girlfriend Amy who have very generously put us up in there lovely pad with efficient air con. Now for those who know the “port-o-loo” story from spring break 2010, Gav and Amy met that night in Hammerhead Fred’s; if you don’t know that story… tough, I ain’t telling it ever again.

What do real Americans do in the real America? Well the answer is obvious:

Go to “America’s best beach” - please note that the sand is more tanned than Jack

Play golf

And shoot guns of course

 

Now I know what you are thinking… “Tristan you look so hard squeezing off some slugs right there” and I completely agree. However after firing my first couple I was utterly shitting my tits, and the bloke came over to check I was ok which took the edge off the hard man imagine for a second or so.

Also in hindsight we had an alarmingly brief safe demonstration, like literally 45 seconds. All he really said was hold it properly and don’t point it at people, if someone ever in some bizarre parallel universe allowed it in England you would be in some classroom for 3 hours and signing 99 forms but here its like “what’s your name? oh ok Christian go get’um!”

Anyway, ladies get down here on Thursday.

Last night we went out for dinner and drinks in an area of Sarasota called Fruitville, and all the roads are called things like Pineapple St. and Lemon Ave. it’s a fresh approach to street names. We were led to a bar called "Smokin' Joe's"...which reminded us of a place we were familiar with, plus it had a news agents in the corner; not even joking.

So the usual hilarity ensued and feeling the effects today but good times to be had again tonight apparently.

Well we leave our old mate G Money on Thursday and fly down to Cancun for Mexican stuff, lets see how we get on.

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